Hearing God.

   The purpose of this  blog is to in some way bring hope and encouragement to people through sharing some of my experience's.  So please leave comments!!!! Let me know what you are feeling!  How God has spoken to you and share your experiences as well!!! I would love for this to be a way that would help people connect!! <3

            So with that being said lol... on to what i really want to share with everyone today!!  hehe ;)  I have really been going through a spiritual battle!  Wondering if i was saved?  If God even wanted me after the life I had lived.   If I was truly being obedient with him,  or being self serving and only following his word on Sunday and then forgetting all about it after church.   God has really spoken to me through his word these past few weeks!!!  Every question has been answered!! How AWESOME is that!!! First i just wanna tell you a really cool way God spoke to me!! Like I said earlier I was struggling on knowing if I was saved.  I work at a hotel in the banquets dept.  Part of my job is to clean the room up.  We have these pads of paper we give the guests.  Well I looked at one of them and it says SAVED on it!  I think to myself  that can't be God its gotta be just a coincidence.  So I brushed it off and continued on cleaning.  Well i look over at the next pad and it says SAVED!  Now i am thinking WHOA!!  Ok maybe this is God.  Still not fully believing it.  Well this past Friday I was setting up a room and went in to the office and looked in a box and AGAIN a piece of paper with SAVED on it!! Now i can't deny that is from God!!! Which brings me to my next thing.  This week i have definitely been struggling with the devil and his lies. I just keep thinking to myself I am not worthy of his love so there for He can't love me.  Which is partially why I couldn't believe that the pieces of paper where God telling me.   I was having godliness in my life but denying His power.  Not believing that when i pray he will answer me!  But he does and has proven that time in time again for me in the past month.  But AM I LISTENING!!  God is always trying to speak but it is up to us if we are going to listen.   By staying in His word and payer I can strengthen my relationship with Jesus.  Another thing that was just pointed out to me in church today during class.  We ourselves did not chose God.  God chose us!  He loved us first.  People of the world  do not understand this and hate us for for believing in Him.  But don't be discouraged if your friends or people start to linger away from you.  Remember Jesus knows how you feel  because he was hated by the world first!  Find your refuge in him and the strength in Him!  Surround yourself with people who love God!  Because you can't do all of it alone! I know that i need a support system!  I need someone to call when I have questions or are struggling.  Always stay surrounded with God!  He will bless you!!! For He knows the plans He has for you.  Plans to prosper you and not to harm you.  Plans to give you hope and a Future. Then you will call upon me and come to me and i will listen to you. You will seek me  and find me when you seek me with all your heart. (Jeremiah 29:11-13)

LOVE YOU!!!!!

I WASN'T PERFECT!!!!!

So i grew up with a pretty normal life.  Great parents that where stable and loving.  wonderful brother and sister.   I  was the youngest and of course spoiled lol.   We all went to church and I had a great relationship with God.   I started high school still Innocent and blameless for the most part.  Fully trusting God.  Then i met a boy.  Now just for the record this blog is kind of sounding like its a sob story about how this boy broke my heart.  I can assure you its not!! lol  He is just a part of my journey.  Now  little did i know at the time that the relationship that we were creating was going to change the relationship I had with my family, God and myself.  I began to doubt God and run from him.  I cut off my emotions from my family and myself.  That boy became my god and my world.  The more our relationship grew the further I was from seeking God and the more the things of this world became to be important.   I became loyal to the world and the devil.  Doing all the things sinful.  I was that girl that everyone was embarrassed to talk about at the family reunion.   I was no where near being the person i wanted to be.  To be honest I didn't look in the mirror much.  I couldn't face myself.  I didn't love myself I didn't trust myself because i didn't know who I was anymore.   I was living a life that was unpleasing to God.  But He was still trying to reach out to me.  He was always in the fore front of my mind.  This little still voice saying I still love you.  I will forgive you and i will love you!!! Him telling me this wasn't the life He wanted for me.  But still I ran.  Choosing to ignore it.  Choosing the world over God. I wasn't ready to face who I was being.  I didn't know if I believed anymore.  And if i chose to believe how could I accept his forgiveness and his love.  How could I accept all of that after i had spent four years being so deceitful and so disobedient?  On January 2nd I STOPPED running.  I accepted Christ in to my life.  And I could definitely feel God in my heart and a significant change in me!!!  God is my world now!!!  He accepted me even though i was broken.  He loves  me even though I get up everyday and in some way fail Him!  How awesome is that!!!  I could never deny Him again!!